How to use Sex Toys in Public

Let’s Go Outside: Using Sex Toys in Public

Some of us do it because we’re thrill-seekers. Some because we’re budding exhibitionists (or voyeurs), and others do it because we’ve grown bored with bouncing around inside our own four walls. What am I talking about? Having sex outside. As exciting as it is, getting jiggy with it in public spaces is pretty much illegal almost everywhere. Luckily for the adventurous, the world of sex toys has grown beyond the big realistic rubber dongs of the 90s and there’s so much available that can help you get your kicks in public without involving other people…or the police. Check out Crimson Princess’s quick picks if you’re in need of a few ideas.

Silent but Delicious

If you’re nervous about using sex toys in public, your best bet would be to try something that doesn’t have a motor first. Your two main options? Kegel balls and butt plugs. There’s something supremely arousing about milling through crowds, throwing yourself around a dancefloor, or chatting to strangers while guarding such an intimate secret. And if you happen to share that secret with someone else, things can get very hot, very fast.

When choosing your toy, it’s important to consider size and weight. After all, you’ll likely be moving around quite a bit and if the toy you’re wearing is too heavy or too big/small, it’s very likely that it’s gonna come slipping out. This very thing happened to me at a barbeque once. I promise you that having a kegel ball rolling around the neck of your boot and then having to hunt for it in a swathe of grass is the opposite of thrilling.

Some great noiseless options are the Fun Factory Smart Balls for vaginal use or B-Balls for anal, both of which are made of silicone. They’re a manageable size, not too heavy, comfortable to wear, and their free-roaming weights can be very apparent when you move. What’s more, if your partner(s) fancies giving you a covert spank, these motorless, internal toys quickly become interactive!

What’s the Buzz?

If you’re not scared of a potential bit of audible buzz, there’s a myriad of stuff you can wear discreetly outdoors. Those who still like the idea of plugs and kegel balls can rejoice thanks to We-Vibe. The Ditto is a small vibrating plug and the Bloom is a vibrating double kegel ball. And because they’re remotely controllable via the We-Connect app (or, you know, actual remote), they’re both 100% partner friendly.

Now, it’s a known fact that many folks who have clits need them to be stimulated if they’re going to have a chance of reaching orgasm. If having or giving someone a big OH in a café or a club is your aim, you need a dual stimulator. Enter the C-shaped vibe!

Both We-Vibe and LELO have made remote controlled C-shaped vibes that stimulate both the vaginal canal and the clitoris (or vulva, depending on personal fit.) The We-Vibe Sync is app controlled, too, so you get a bit ore discretion with that one, not to mention a tad more power. And, as vibrators go, they’re all pretty quiet. I mean, if you’re in a joint where everyone whispers and it’s so quiet you can hear the chef sweating out back in the kitchen, it’s likely that your sneaky sexing will be heard. But if you’re in a place with even just a regular level of noise, the buzzing is likely to go unnoticed.


No, as important as it is, I don’t mean your consent or your partners. I’m talking about the people around you. While it’s very possible that the group of dudebros on the next table to yours would be ecstatic to learn that you had something buzzing away in your drawers, it’s more likely that whoever you inadvertently bring into your play will be unconsenting and uncomfortable.

Be mindful of those around you. Can they hear your toy buzzing, or your quiet moans or surprised squeaks? If you should happen to get close to orgasm, will it be obvious by the look on your face?

Keeping it Clean

Many of us will insert our chosen toys in the comfort of our own homes before we venture out into the wild, but for others, much of the thrill will be in the very act of slipping them into our bodies outside. Again, there’s the issue of consent. Can anyone see you sneaking your hand up your skirt or down the back of your jeans?

And then there’s the question of hygiene. How likely is it that the place you’ve chosen to stop and pop in your butt plug is free from bacterial nasties? Not very, I would imagine. If you really must do the deed outside, ensure that you’ve carried your toy in its case if it has one, or in a sandwich bag or one of those anti-bacterial wash bags. Don’t put your toy down on any surfaces, not even on top of a tissue or paper towel, because they won’t be sufficiently clean. And finally, have some hand sanitiser with you and use it before and after you insert your toy.

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